You know what, I think I have a fear, and intense fear of something, but I don't know what it is. I think there is an iron fist clenched shut around something, and I absolutely can not pry it open to see what it is, let alone release it.

But the more I think about it, the more I feel that it isn't my responsibility to let it out. I think sooner or later there will be a random turn of events, and then, in turn, my fear will be revealed.

The true opponent to be overcome is oneself-- one's petty ego, fears and frustrations, self-limiting concepts, all that constricts one's conciousness.

I have been meditating recently. Frustrations have been a big problem for me. There are many things that I have tried to overcome in my life that I have consistently given up on. Giving up is a huge problem of mine. Naturally, frustration follows giving up. And so you can only imagine how frustrating it is to try to halt frustrations.

Anyway, I'm working on it.

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